So here is the deal, a lot of people have a vision of what they want their 2017 to look like, but the truth of the matter is, not everyone will make their vision a reality. So what is the secret? The secret is…wait for it… to have the awareness of, dun dun dun, “THE TERROR BARRIER!”
First let’s start off with showing you a visual to reference how the terror barrier works – please make note of my amazing graphic design skills! Hopefully, you will get the drift:)
When we desire change, we are required to go through the terror barrier (Bob Proctor coined the term,“Terror Barrier”). So how does this actually work? There is a part of you, what I call the Conditioned Self, which does not like change. In fact, it absolutely despises change. It loves the comfort zone, even if the comfort zone is absolutely miserable.
You also have an authentic part of you. Your Authentic Self is the real you. It is your spirit, it is your inner truth, it is your compass to a better life, it is your gifts, passions, and purpose! The dreams and visions come for your Authentic Self. Your Authentic Self knows what you need to do to bring you joy, fulfillment, and purpose.
THE TERROR BARRIER:
When you start to make changes to create your vision, you start off in the bottom part of the rectangle, as shown above. The bottom part of the rectangle represents the conditioned part of you that is comfy and cozy. Miserable, but comfy and cozy. As you start to make changes, it is as if an alarm system goes off and the conditioned part wakes up and says, oh shoot, time for battle they’re going to try to make changes again!
The conditioned part of you prevents change by quietly telling you limiting beliefs and lies that will hold you back. Some limiting beliefs include things such as “you can’t do this; you have tried this before, but it never worked, why would it work this time; you are lazy, you will never stick with it; you are not smart enough, you don’t know enough; what will people think of you…” and it goes on and on and on. The limiting beliefs start out quietly, but as you continue to make changes, they get louder and louder and louder! They get so loud and intense, you find yourself up at the left corner of the rectangle, which is the actual terror barrier. The self-doubt and limiting beliefs are so intense; you assume the lies are the truth, and that they are indicators that you are not capable of the changes you are trying to make, which is a complete lie!
Let me be very clear when I say, DO NOT STOP! When it gets hard, you keep going. When you fall down, you get up. When you “fail,” embrace it, learn from it, and move on. Once you get to the other side of the terror barrier, you will find peace, joy, fulfillment, and pride that you made it through the fire of fear. Trust me, I have been there, REPEATEDLY! It is hard, but it is worth it! The other side of the terror barrier is where life begins!
One more thing I want to share about the terror barrier. When you make positive changes for yourself, you know you will go through your own terror barrier. But people around you will go through their own terror barrier as well! So we have 2 terror barriers we need to address…AWESOME, I know! So how does this look? When you are making positive changes for yourself, there are going to be people in your life who will lift you up and will support you while you are on your journey. However, there will also be people in your life who you will share your vision with and their conditioned selves and fear will get triggered. You will know this when they try to say things in an attempt to hold you back or things that are not supporting you with your higher vision. This does not make them bad people; it just means your positive changes are triggering their own fears and insecurities.
Here are 3 steps to help get you through the terror barrier (I wish I could add an audio of someone screaming every time I write terror barrierJ)”
- As you make changes, know it will get harder before it gets easier. If it is easy, you are probably not doing the work you need to do to make the change happen. I know that it is not a light tip, but it is the reality of change.
- When things feel really hard, journal! Journaling will allow you to bring the lies and limiting beliefs to the surface, allowing you to bring in the truth from your loving, wise, adult, and spiritual connection.
- GET SUPPORT! The bigger the change and vision, the more support you need! I have needed a village at times, I swear, to help me battle my conditioned self within the terror barrier process! I can recommend a coach if you need extra support:)
- Be very selective with whom you share your goals with. If you find yourself in a situation where the other person is not able to support you because their own fears or insecurities are being triggered, say to yourself, “I have empathy for them and their fear. They are allowed to have their feelings, but I do not have to run their feelings through my body. I feel good about what I am doing for myself and my life. I will continue to move forward, regardless of what others think of me.”
I hope you have found this information helpful. As always, I love hearing from you! Please let me know something you have done to help create your life vision!
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Ronda Stevens is a licensed mental health therapist, certified health & wellness coach, certified holistic coach and founder of Ready, Set, Live Holistic Life and Wellness Coaching! Ronda has years of experience with compassionately guiding and supporting people make changes that dramatically improve and change lives! To learn more, please visit her website at www.getreadysetlive.com. You can call contact her via email at firstname.lastname@example.org . She is also available via phone 1-800-558-7080.